Siobhan’s HILARIOUS song for all the mums

“Siobhan’s HILARIOUS song for all the mums | Auditions | BGT 2019,” is an absolute gem from the Britain’s Got Talent stage, featuring the wonderful Siobhan Phillips. The clip, which has amassed over 5 million views and nearly 90,000 likes since its upload in April 2019, is a masterclass in musical comedy and instantly became an anthem for exhausted parents everywhere! 🏆🤣

🎤 The Introduction: A Star is Born (at 42!)

Siobhan, a vibrant and charming 42-year-old from Wakefield, steps onto the immense stage, immediately disarming the judges—especially the famously skeptical Simon Cowell—with her self-deprecating humor. When asked about her age, she playfully quips, “I know I don’t look it!” setting the tone for a truly lighthearted and witty performance. Her “big dream,” as she explains, is not global domination, but simply to have a venue where people have paid specifically to come and see her perform. It’s a beautifully humble aspiration that immediately wins over the audience. She walks over to the piano, ready to share a piece of her life. 🎹✨

📝 The Premise: Motherhood in the Middle Years

Siobhan then explains the inspiration for her original composition: she became a first-time mother just a couple of years prior, an experience she sums up with perfect comedic timing: “I thought to myself, what other waits on Fox… I’m really old and tired and now I’ll have a baby”. This immediately resonates with the parents in the audience, who know the shock of late-in-life sleepless nights. She jokingly says she always writes about subjects she is familiar with, but hilariously adds that she “couldn’t think of a melody around cake”, confirming her status as a genuine comedic writer. The scene is perfectly set for a musical lament that is more triumph than tragedy. 👶👵

🎶 The Performance: A Hilarious Anthem

The music begins—a bright, lively tune that wonderfully contrasts with the weary nature of the lyrics. Siobhan’s performance style is part cabaret, part musical theatre, delivered with an impeccable Northern dry wit. The opening lines hit instantly:

“Had a baby at 40, what did I do. I haven’t slept since, I look 102.”

The sheer honesty and perfect rhyme scheme send a wave of laughter through the theatre. She sings about those brief, fleeting moments where she wishes she could think, only to be snapped back to reality by the baby’s smile, prompting her to repeat the cycle—but ruefully wishing she had “skipped the toddler years”. This blend of exasperation and unconditional love is the core truth of her act. 💖😩

🚽 The Universal Truths of Parental Chaos

The song excels in detailing the small, previously taken-for-granted luxuries that disappear with a child. The line that garnered one of the biggest reactions is her heartfelt desire for the ultimate luxury:

“Going to the loo alone would be a special treat to read my Kindle on the beach.”

This single observation—the yearning for a sacred, uninterrupted bathroom break—draws massive applause and knowing head-shakes from the judges, including Alesha Dixon and Amanda Holden, who are themselves mothers. Siobhan moves seamlessly into the physical toll of motherhood, lamenting the need to “join the gym again” and the completely relatable domestic blunders: “I accidentally put my pair up backwards”. It is pure, glorious, messy reality delivered with a smile. 🙈👚

👑 The Grand Finale: Marrying into the Cowell Dynasty

The crescendo of the song is a brilliant, audacious move that ties her personal ambition directly into the Britain’s Got Talent universe. After humorously noting her daughter is too young to discuss the “Brexit deal”, she leans in and stage-whispers her ultimate hope for her child’s future, a goal that would secure her family’s path and cement her relationship with the head judge: “All my bits crossed, she’ll be Eric Cowell’s wife”. 💍💰 The sheer cheek and genius of the line causes the judges to absolutely lose it! Simon Cowell, famed for his poker face, breaks into a massive, delighted smile at the idea of Siobhan as his future in-law.

Siobhan Phillips didn’t just deliver an audition; she gave a cathartic, side-splitting performance that captured the chaotic beauty of motherhood. Her infectious energy and the undeniable relatability of her song earned her the standing ovation she deserved, and no doubt, a resounding four YESES to send her through to the next round! Her dream came true, proving that honesty and humor are truly golden talents. ✨👏 You can enjoy this hilarious audition below: